Weeknotes 2021 #18: banishing the adrenaline

  • Went to see the family for the first time in 10 months. Went to the seaside. Walked along a pier. A seagull ate Dad’s ice cream. The sun came out. Normality. Slight relaxation.
  • On the way home, a push news alert about a spike in cases in the Llandudno area (which we had just left).
  • Great.
  • No-one has the ‘rona, thankfully.
  • My cousin had never heard of Acorn Antiques! I used this news as an excuse to go back and watch it in all its glory.
  • So I’ve been feeling pretty anxious the past couple of weeks and I’ve been trying to unpack why. I am currently picking “Let down syndrome” as the biggest culprit: adrenaline withdrawal.
  • After a long time of working on quite an intense programme of work at pace, I’m struggling to slow the pace down.
  • The symptoms of let-down effect:
    • a strong compulsion to be “doing something” while at home or on vacation
    • an obsession with thoughts about what remains undone
    • a feeling of vague guilt while resting
    • fidgeting, restlessness, pacing, leg kicking or fast gum chewing, and inability to concentrate for very long on any relaxing activity, feelings of irritability and aggravation
    • a vague (or somethings profound) feeling of depression whenever you stop an activity.
  • Strongly relating to these.
  • After a couple of lighter weeks, I’m trying to throw this energy back into exercise and hope the anxiety is just a phase as I adjust to a slightly more normal work pace. Otherwise I’m going to continue to be a pretty difficult person to be around.
  • Continuing to hoover Line of Duty. Arnott’s just grown a beard.

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